An Introduction to Snowmobiling to be the coolest!
December 12, 2022
(Warning: This is a work of student satire and is meant for entertainment purposes only.)
This column of tips provided by Johnny Livdanjurusly – Snowboarding Columnist
Snowfall in Colorado is renowned for supporting the ski industry and providing a large portion of the water that flows into the major rivers of the American West. All areas of Colorado have snowfall during the winter, although the high mountains cutting across the state’s middle have the greatest snowpack’s. This high amount of snowfall makes snowmobiling one of the fun things Colorado is known for.
So, if it’s your first time snowboarding, I have some “helpful” tips for beginners. However, keep in mind that no matter what happens when you snowboard, the number one rule is to look cool while doing it!
Tip #1 Safety First
As with any tips list, I guess we should start with fundamental safety concerns. The “dangers” of snowmobiling must be “understood”. They say that when you first start riding, you might not be aware of these risks and ride too quickly. If you move at speeds that are beyond your capacity, this could be disastrous, or so they say.
So, for step number one, you want to make sure you are not wearing a helmet; I mean why would you want your head to look big then it already is. That goes against the number one rule of snowboarding, looking cool. Also they just weigh you down and slow down the snowmobile. It’s not like you are going to get in an accident on your first ever run.
Also, riding alone is better than riding with someone because, I mean, if you get lost, wouldn’t you want people looking for you and getting all the attention?
Tip #2 Gear and equipment
I know it’s cold where you’re going to be snowmobiling, and you’re assuming you have to be covered up with layers of clothes etc. Wrong! You want to be different than everyone else and stand out. I’d suggest you wear what you’d wear in the summer and have all heads turned, looking at how cool you can be.
Tip #3 How to ride
Once you have or rented a snowmobile, it’s time to ride! After you’re all dressed like its summer and no helmet is on or googles, you want to start off by turning the snowmobile on and immediately going full speed. Hit that gas pedal and I’d say go full blast to enjoy the moment. Also, when you get to sharp turns, don’t slow down! That’s where you should hit the gas pedal and go above 80. It’s such a fun experience you won’t regret it!
Final thoughts
Everybody begins somewhere. Welcome to the group if you’ve just started snowmobiling. It’s a fantastic sport with the potential to become a lifelong passion. It is never too late to start, and the sport is always changing.
As you learn about the sport, applying the advice will help you develop your abilities and be prepared for the fundamentals. To begin, all you really need is snow and a snowmobile.
Editor’s note (12/12/2022):
It is our sad duty to announce that snowboarding columnist Johnny Livdanjurusly has passed away. He was in an unfortunate snowmobiling accident. Johnny took a turn too fast and went sailing off of the mountainside. His life might have been spared if he had been wearing a helmet and more clothes than a speedo to cushion the impact.
R.I.P. Johnny Livdanjurusly
Snowmobiling Columnist
12/10/22 – 12/12/22.